No, I don't - nevermind. This is so stupid. I'm just going to be sad in a pond forever alone. No! Why! You don't deserve that! I'm going to come with you to your pond and we're going to hang out every day, so there!
... Okay! Alright! Completely removed from the moment I'll admit it's all a bit stupid! There were probably other ways to do that than to make a deal with a horrible witch! I don't exactly want to sit in a pond forever alone either!
I mean, I think we all had to make some pretty bad deals, probably. I'm not judging you. I know I was willing to give up some pretty big stuff.
But it just - I don't think Elody being happy means you have to be sad! She cares about you, the sword said it, and I know that isn't what you wanted to hear, but it means you being sad will make her sad!
[ yeah, well, probably, but maybe elody being sad over this for a little while and then moving on is better than her being sad, forever, tied to him that way. but he doesn't quite know how to explain that to a twelve year old. ]
I don't know that I'll be sad.
[ he probably won't have many feelings about it at all. being a giant frog. ]
Well, you won't be, because I'm coming with you to live in the pond, and I'm a lot of fun!
[and actually it's not even that sad to think about it that way. she's been telling herself this whole time, in a way, that ylfa isn't needed, the wolf is what she's needed for, and maybe it's okay if she doesn't hold onto ylfa so hard.
but the wolf wouldn't hang out every day with gerard in the pond, so she probably does need to stick around.]
[ he doesn't hate this, actually. its kind of nice to think that even after you're a giant, nameless frog who lives in a pond, his friends will still want to come hang out. and it's kind of nice to hear ylfa talk like she's going to be okay after everything. ]
You could at least live on dry land next to the pond.
[she would probably live on dry land next to the pond, especially because she's officially invited now, thanks for the official invite.
i think the idea of an ending where she isn't needed scares ylfa because she's still wrapping her head around her fears of whether she's wanted. she'd rather just be a reaper than contemplate going back and finding out that she's too messed up to fit in, or that looking after a little girl with a lot of problems when she's not also keeping you alive in every combat round feels like more of a burden or an obligation. timothy already has a problematic kid to look after. her grandma might have some mixed feelings about wolves now. she's...she's not going to go back to live with her mom, she's never going to go back there. it's not that she thinks destiny's children wouldn't still want to be her friend, it's just that it's the kind of fear about relationships you depend on changing profoundly that's too scary to contemplate and she'd rather just not.
if gerard still needs her, though, that's easier. she can just fight off any massive herons and enormous dogs that try to bother him in his giant frog pond. so the reaper plan is instantly 100% abandoned.]
[ god help. well, that's fine. it really is better than the reaper plan which is just depressing and sad. mostly gerard hopes that the rest of destiny's children are going to stick around too? he hadn't thought about it at all, actually. especially considering the whole, uh, going to die a horrible frog in the upcoming battle high probability, but. he doesn't hate the idea.
he's sadly gotten used to having a few friends around. and it's kind of nice. he's never had a life other than his one with elody, and he doesn't know what that looks like without her, and this way he doesn't really have to imagine one. being a frog isn't going to be much of one to imagine. ]
[this memory is a lot better to her! it's more normal. she does eat a man at the end of it. but it's normal.]
...Well, it's not so much a matter of wanting to.
[but yes, unlike the rest of them, maybe out of kindness because she was a child and because the wolf is a wolf but he's not a wicked stepmother, she was given the chance not to keep going with them. maybe something a little like being put into the book, living out the rest of her days in a gentle story where nothing could hurt her but she couldn't help.]
I'm not sure I got at the time what he meant, about bringing my memories and experiences to it...but I think it would have been pretty weird to go back there. After...everything. You know? Being with you guys is much better.
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[no he seems nice she immediately regrets that.]
No, I don't - nevermind. This is so stupid. I'm just going to be sad in a pond forever alone. No! Why! You don't deserve that! I'm going to come with you to your pond and we're going to hang out every day, so there!
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okay ]
... Okay! Alright! Completely removed from the moment I'll admit it's all a bit stupid! There were probably other ways to do that than to make a deal with a horrible witch! I don't exactly want to sit in a pond forever alone either!
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But it just - I don't think Elody being happy means you have to be sad! She cares about you, the sword said it, and I know that isn't what you wanted to hear, but it means you being sad will make her sad!
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I don't know that I'll be sad.
[ he probably won't have many feelings about it at all. being a giant frog. ]
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Well, you won't be, because I'm coming with you to live in the pond, and I'm a lot of fun!
[and actually it's not even that sad to think about it that way. she's been telling herself this whole time, in a way, that ylfa isn't needed, the wolf is what she's needed for, and maybe it's okay if she doesn't hold onto ylfa so hard.
but the wolf wouldn't hang out every day with gerard in the pond, so she probably does need to stick around.]
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You could at least live on dry land next to the pond.
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[she would probably live on dry land next to the pond, especially because she's officially invited now, thanks for the official invite.
i think the idea of an ending where she isn't needed scares ylfa because she's still wrapping her head around her fears of whether she's wanted. she'd rather just be a reaper than contemplate going back and finding out that she's too messed up to fit in, or that looking after a little girl with a lot of problems when she's not also keeping you alive in every combat round feels like more of a burden or an obligation. timothy already has a problematic kid to look after. her grandma might have some mixed feelings about wolves now. she's...she's not going to go back to live with her mom, she's never going to go back there. it's not that she thinks destiny's children wouldn't still want to be her friend, it's just that it's the kind of fear about relationships you depend on changing profoundly that's too scary to contemplate and she'd rather just not.
if gerard still needs her, though, that's easier. she can just fight off any massive herons and enormous dogs that try to bother him in his giant frog pond. so the reaper plan is instantly 100% abandoned.]
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he's sadly gotten used to having a few friends around. and it's kind of nice. he's never had a life other than his one with elody, and he doesn't know what that looks like without her, and this way he doesn't really have to imagine one. being a frog isn't going to be much of one to imagine. ]
If you insist.
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You didn't want to go to the story where you could stay with your grandmother?
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...Well, it's not so much a matter of wanting to.
[but yes, unlike the rest of them, maybe out of kindness because she was a child and because the wolf is a wolf but he's not a wicked stepmother, she was given the chance not to keep going with them. maybe something a little like being put into the book, living out the rest of her days in a gentle story where nothing could hurt her but she couldn't help.]
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... I, um, asked the Fairy with Turquoise Hair to put me into the book.
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[it wouldn't even occur to her to judge gerard for asking.]
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[ that's alright then. ]
It would have been okay if you had picked that, you know. I'm glad you're here, and that you stayed, but ...
[ they really did put this child through hell. ]
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[sincerely; she doesn't regret her choice.]
I'm not sure I got at the time what he meant, about bringing my memories and experiences to it...but I think it would have been pretty weird to go back there. After...everything. You know? Being with you guys is much better.